We’ll get to Top Chef in a moment. But first, another delicious night of Survivor treachery and strategery where Sugar, once again, proves that playing with your heart can actually get you somewhere in the world. Or, at least in this particular game. She teams up with Bob, hands off her idol at the last possible second to Matty, winks at Susie…..and Crystal is outta there. Should have been Kenny, but I’m supposing they kept him there so Bob could kinda sorta keep his word to Kenny in keeping the immunity necklace since he knew Kenny wasn’t in danger. Which, he wasn’t. Last night, anyway.

Bob is the only guy I know who can make two fake idols, put them both into play, lie to one of the power players in the game - twice - and still basically look like a guy who has maintained his integrity throughout. I heart Bob in a big way. He’s having the time of his life, is a challenge monster (4 in a row! Dude!) and has somehow managed to make his awkward social game work for him, too. Whoda thunk it?

I don’t see any scenario in which Kenny survives to the final 2 or 3 unless he wins immunity, Bob’s integrity notwithstanding. I’d be perfectly happy with a Sugar, Bob, Matty/Susie final three, as they are all likable, more or less. Altho I’d like to see the win go to Sugar or Bob. I don’t think Sugar could pull off the votes in this particular jury, so, right now, it’s Bob’s million to win or lose. Good times.

Oh, and Randy? Women will not think the mohawk is hot.

Over on Top Chef, the hilarity continues as we discover the Stefan has a crush on Jaime. We also find out that he’s been married twice…to the same woman. Now divorced twice. From the same woman. And currently has the hots for the only gay girl in the room. Love. It!

We hear from Hosea and Leah that they’re “just friends” as they both have significant others at home. Um. ‘K. If I was your sig other, I’d be thinking just what the rest of us are thinking, which is….doesn’t look like just friends to me. Which is seemingly backed up by Tom Collichio, who in an interview this week said the two are still dating even as I type. Hunh. Imagine that.

Hosea wins a taste off against Stefan (good times!) and then the big challenge is catering Gail’s bridal shower. Hootie! (Just seeing if you’re paying attention….you were supposed to say Hoo! Keep up.) So we have four teams - Something Old, Borrowed, New, and Blue. Two teams excel, two….not so much.

I’m going on record right now and saying that I heart Fabio and would totally believe that yellow and green make blue if I heard it in that accent, too. (It’s yellow and blue to make green, but clearly the women who were all oooooh and ahhhhhhh bought it just like I would have…..) He’s got a gorgeous wife, as does Eugene! And I love Fabio’s sense of humor about the whole thing and about himself. I am hoping we see him stick around till the end game. (Love that he cooked for his own wife’s bridal shower - “Don’t want to make the bride mad right before the wedding!” Love. Him.)

Jaime, on the other hand….not so much. Some have called her and her arms folded I hate losing bitch face a reminder of Lisa from last season. I wouldn’t go that far. Lisa pretty much has that crown screwed onto her head. I’m thinking more Tiffany from, lo, those many season’s past. Jaime is a bit miffed that she’s not getting credit where it’s due (dude, you’re finishing near the top every time. Shut up.) and has absolutely no game face about how pissed she is that she’s not winning a set of steak knives. I think she definitely has the cooking chops (Lisa…) but needs to work on the pouty face and good sportsmanship or I’m going to have to put her in L column — which, in this case isn’t L for Love. More like L for Loser. Or Lisa. You pick.

She Bangs girl, you know who I mean, can’t remember her name, but wow with the sideways green gangsta hat? For reals? Not. Getting. It. So she’s not making my Love List. Leah isn’t either, though Hosea clings there due to his win over Stefan.

Also on my Love List…Jeff! He’s been the kindest, most even keeled, helpful guy (he was the one who urged Ariane to wait on that lamb a few more minutes, which, in end cost him the likely win) and helped to plate their service, to boot. He handled Stefan’s natural overbearance and arrogance politely but firmly, stuck to his guns, and created the sorbet Stefan insisted would never work….and came in a close second for his efforts. Stefan’s reaction to the judges love of the Jeff sorbet? More Good Times. Really, this season…loving it.

Ariane snatches victory from the jaws of Jaime’s defeat. Collichio also said in his interview that had she expressed more clearly that she’d been the one conceptualizing the entire dish, as opposed to just preparing the exquisite carrot puree accompaniement to the perfectly cooked (thanks Jeff!) lamb by Ariane…she’d have been a stronger contender for the win.

I’m fine with Ariane for that win. Again. She’s earning her chops. For the most part, the whole team is fun to watch. Oh yeah…mostly because an entirely delusional Danny gets sent packing (and still, not only in his exit speech on the air Wednesday night, but also in his post-exit interview yesterday….is still completely clueless as to owning up that he essentially sucked.) Even Eugene grasped where he went wrong and owned it. Which is why he’s still there. And Danny, you are not. (Thank you, judges panel!)

Next week? Survivor Finale Sunday….and Martha on Top Chef. Good, good times, they just keep a coming.

Which means it must be time to give away a free book! Avalanche of entries, but only one winner, and this week it’s Kathleen E! Woo hoo, Kathleen!!

Tune in Monday for all the gritty play-by-play final tribal MAC….and the last contest before the holidays are upon us!

Have a great weekend…..stay safe, stay warm. Read a book!

And? DISH!!!

Tags: Writing //