We’ll get to Grease in a minute. I’m still having a hard time typing after witnessing the blinding white that are Donald Trump’s feet. My goodness gracious I didn’t know they made skin that translucent.

Okay, so this week’s Apprentice was really…all kinds of wrong. I’m perfectly fine with Frank’s team losing, because Frank? Wow, he needs to leave my television set post haste. (Although highlight of the show? Trump telling him not to worry about the sleeping in tents thing as he’ll be back in the Bronx soon. Ha.) And Carey? I’m with Muna. Way too much 411 with those trunks, sweetie. Not that the other team blew me away with their ho hum swim line, but dayum. Did they have to be pink, too? Really? And kudos to the winning team for acting all excited about that reward. Most Insulting Reward Possibly Ever. Playboy bunnies? Whose reward is this? Trump’s reward, that’s whose. Certainly not the women on the team. And neither most of the guys. I laughed and laughed when the girls pushed newly revealed gay guy Derek into the pool and got all that tanned boob flesh in his face. Talk about a waste of perfectly good implants. At least he (and the women from what I could tell) were good sports about the whole thing. I noticed Ivanka sat that one out. I knew I liked her for a reason. (Except, pssst, the shorter hair looked better. What? It does.)

What was good about winning was the fact that Heidi’s team gets double immunity. No one goes home this week, and they don’t even have to perform the next task. (I know. Makes no sense to do this, but whatever. This show is drowning and Burnett needs new ideas.) So it’s tent city (aka Trump Trailer Park) for Frank/Nicole’s team. And am I the only one who wonders how the hell they get all business-suit pressed and ready living in those tents? The camera shots of camp prove that these people are apparently used to living with hired help or something. Ew.

One thing I love? The other team listening in on their conversations through the hedge. I would totally do this. I would feel horribly bad about it, of course, (okay, maybe not where Frank is concerned) but I would totally listen in. Sure, you say you wouldn’t eavesdrop, but you know if you could hear their voices drifting over the hedge, you’d be all leaning over and trying to hear what they’re talking about while pretending to fix your sandal strap. Fess up.

The boardroom. So, some of the team tries to throw Michelle under the bus for being a solo player who thought the pink trunks were heinous and refused to go along with the team. Most notably the designer of said trunks, Carey, as he understandably tries to save his own (very fine) ass. Most of the team, however, tries to throw Carey under the bus for designing gaywear for the mainstream market (hey, he tagged it, not me.) This boardroom was a far more entertaining boardroom than last week (but then, root canal would be more entertaining than more of Frank screaming.) Everyone was pretty good natured about it, but I think right up until Trump fired him, Carey thought he was going to pull it out. He looked truly devastated to be leaving (even if he did get to keep the pink trunks.) But, given the choices, and despite liking him and thinking him well spoken, it was the right call. Maybe Nicole should have gone. I’d have been okay with that, but Carey, dude, pink mini trunks? Really?

So, next week it’s definitely Frank/Nicole’s team losing as they are the only ones playing, but there is the news of a boardroom bombshell being dropped. My my. I guess I’ll have to keep watching. (As long as I’m self medicated with plenty of ice cream and a pre-show party of Grease singing.)

Which brings me to Grease. A lot more of nothing much last night as we witness the last of the initial auditions and a lot of manufactured drama. I still like the show, like the judges, even like the Cat Deeley impersonator, (but less Billy this week - pout. I know this makes some people really happy, but I like Billy. Sue me.) What’s wrong with this show is that, so far, none of the contestants are really grabbing my heartstrings. And this worries me. We should be feeling some attachment by now and I’m more lukewarm than excited about any of these hopefuls. Maybe that will change when we get to know them better. Next up is Grease Academy, where the 50 semi finalists will train in dance, voice, and acting before being cut down to the final 12 who will compete for our hearts and our votes. I hope I love it more by then. I have faith.

Tune in tomorrow for the next SHaQ Attack contest question.

And, oh yeah, tennis is back, tennis is back! Yay!! Grand Slam season has returned. Now is that brief time of year when all of my sports are on at the same time. Football, basketball, and tennis. Life is good.

Tags: Writing //