It’s beige-y brown night on Idol. Even Kristy Lee in the audience got the memo. Her’s came with sequins apparently. RyRy tells us that we got 45 million votes last night. Not surprising since everyone was frantic to keep their fave after the night of a thousand trainwrecks. Well, it kind of felt that way. I have to wonder on a show that pulls in this kind of dough for the network (yes, ratings are down, but that’s only comparative to itself. Comparative to everyone else? It’s still the elephant in the room. The very rich elephant.) So why cram it into an hour? I mean, we can laze around and fluff fill endless amounts of time on results night, but nooooo, can’t spare an extra thirty minutes for the double song performance night. Just sayin.

Neil Diamond is performing, as is Natasha Bedingfield. The Top Five do the tribute to the mentor thing. Jason kicks it off with Cracklin Rosie. See? This is why we needed Chikezie. He’d have rocked that one. And been interesting. The choreo is so…amusing. Cook picks up the tune from Archie and wow, see? That’s how you command attention. Aaaaand, we lose it when it kicks abruptly to the ladies and Song Sung Blue. Wow, they suck. (Sorry, there’s no way to pretty that up.) Ah well….my FF finger is itchin, y’all. The Hot August Night opening is not an improvement because someone thought pairing Brooke with, well, anyone, Cook in this case, was a good idea. It’s amazing, in this group sing, how lame the girls are. Truly. Even Jason stands out above them with his understated vocals. Okay, when they all run together and start singing as One, Jason is really just enjoyig the hell out himself, isn’t he? I love him when he gets all…..animated. Archie gets the solo on the Brother Love’s Travelin Salvation Show part. Then Cook just yanks it away from everyone, even with the one line he gets at the end. It’s clear how much more powerful his voice is than any of the rest of them. Dominant, that guy.

We come back from more So You Think You Can Dance commericals - yay! Then–hey! Warn me when you’re going to throw Constantine at me like that. Geez! And Gina Glocksen. (Who actually doesn’t look half bad…) And then RyRy, really? The Face? We do NOT need The Face from Constantine. Ever. Again. But then Hi Ace Young! And the little throw up in my mouth goes away. I know, I know, but he’s a cutie.

We get a Neil As MisterRogers wisdom moment. Then a quick rundown of last nights performances, where - shocking! - they don’t address Paula being Froot Loopie or the fact that they take notes from rehearsal and use them during the live show since they can’t half hear the singers performing live due to the screamy teenybopper mosh pit.

But one thing about the little snippets from last night? I still love Jason on Forever In Blue Jeans. I’m totally downloading the studio version when it’s out today. Just sayin. What else I’m sayin is I hate how they just pump Archie all over the place and come on, he’s Up With America, at best, but thrash Jason. Yes, I’d love to see Jason grow a little and stretch more. I’m not saying the criticism isn’t valid. His sound is an acquired taste. I happened to acquire it.

But Archie sounds just like he did on Night One, and how he will always sound, and it’s becoming clear that in terms of packing a punch that will reverberate in today’s music world…not so much. Sor-ry! I’d be shocked if he had a hit record. Even of the Clay Aiken not-on-the-radio-but-million-copies-sold-anyway variety. Jason? I download and enjoy - surprisingly more than I think I will. Every time. He pops up on my iPod and I’m always “wow, I still like it” and no FF’s. Which I honestly thought I would after a listen or two. You know how many Archie songs are in my iPod? Zero. That’s several less than Chikezie, folks, and he was gone a month ago.

Okay, back to the show. Oh, one thing - Cook? Go back to the new hairstyle. Just sayin.

Woooo, RyRy IS going to address the “live curveball” as he calls it, from last night after all. Oookay. I’m dying to hear this. And, total dodge!! All he says is that he read the rumors about Paula online, and the controversy her behavior sparked last night (not saying exactly what the rumors are, mind you) then just says, “Not true. She’s part of our family.” Yeah. That clears it RIGHT up. Sheesh.

Now it’s time to call the players on deck. First up? Jason Castro. (Thank god, of anyone, he deserves not to sweat it out, good or bad, after last night.) He interviews really well, in regards to why he thinks he’s getting the criticism and what he needs to do if he moves on. Actually, best strung together words for him yet in a live interview. Props, Woodland Dude! And? He’s totally in the Top Four. YAY!!

Archie next. Tweenies go wild. And he’s also Top Four (and seems sincerely surprised.)

Next week is the Rock N Roll Hall of Fame show. No mentor maybe? I dunno. But the themes this year have kind of killed the show a little. Okay, a lot. Beatles? Good once, then they ruined that. Fun with Dolly (shocking for a country night which is usually hard to do) then killed it dead again with Inspirational Night. Someone thought a diva night was a good idea, especially as the kids get thrashed whenever they sing one, so yeah, let’s do that. Then it’s Andrew Lloyd Weber. Really. And then Neil, who should have been more fun than he was, but everything was so damn rushed. And. come on, I love his stuff, but more dated stuff. Yay. No. Song choice buzz kill. Because all the kids can sing. So that’s not it. Now Rock N Roll Hall of Fame. Should be great - tons of stuff to work with and modernize that maybe isn’t as stylistic as Neil. Or Mariah. Or any of them, really. I’m not holding my breath.

But first - squeee! - a So You Think You Can Dance break. Yay! Hi Cat Deeley! I’ve missed you! Mostly when I’m forced to watch Samantha. May 22nd - be there!

Ryan calls out David Cook. Aaaaand, at least three out of the four Final Four are the guys. So, from the beginning predictions, no surprise there. Except they’re one guy short.

So, Syesha and Brooke - bottom two. Me? I’m hoping Syesha stays this time around.

Natasha and Neil sing - not together. Natasha asks to run over to the couches and say hi to the idols, but she really just wants to squeeze Archie’s cheeks and maybe take him home. Ryan tries to hook Archie up with Natasha for his prom date, which she fields quite well and he actually looks more cute about it than terror struck, so that’s a step in the right direction.

Oh no. The Q & A’s are back. I hate these. But it makes the hour go by much faster since I don’t watch them. Okay, so I totally had to stop and watch Simon turn ten shades of pink when his first kiss (age 9) is one of the caller. Awwwwww! And to think I almost missed that.

I found out one other thing. I can still listen to Neil Diamond sing all night. Watch him? Not so much. I don’t know why it weirds me out, but it does. Good song, though. All that’s missing are the pros from Dancing With The Stars.

Who’s going home? It’s time to find out. Syesha? Total pro as she awaits the announcement. Brooke? Already crying. Please, America, tell me you us both out of our misery. And WOW! They did! Brooke? Outta there. Dang. That’s two right calls in a row on my Little Reality Show Fest. Hunh. First Shannon, now Brooke. Maybe we can make it a trifecta and boot Parvati next! (Or a double down and get rid of Lisa on Top Chef.) But for now? I will enjoy the knowledge that I’m all done having to worry about her imminent nervous breakdown. Mostly because we might see it right now. Remember how little Ramiele (doesn’t that seem like a lifetime ago she was here?) anyway, remember how she cried and cried and had to pull it together to sing? Take that, and all the other criers, and multiply by infinity…and that’s how hard Brooke is crying right now. She had to be peeled off Ryan and then attached herself, suction cup like, to Syesha. Really. I don’t know how she’s going to sing. On the up side? Her husband can go the barber now. (Except I like his curly locks.) Perhaps mercifully, my tifaux cuts out during her sing out, which was a little wrenching to watch. Like Carly before her (who I thought would lose it like this, but didn’t at all) I hope she takes what this opportunity has given her and does something with it and finds fulfillment. For me? I’m okay that I don’t have to be part of that journey any longer.

So….whaddya think? David, Archie, Castro…and Syesha. Top Four. I’m good with this. Me, I want a Castro-Cook finale, but it’s clear they want Jason off and Archie in the end. And, that wouldn’t be such a bad thing as Archie would do better with the “win” on the show, leaving Cook to get out there and make the record he wants, and not the record Nigel thinks we want. In fact, let’s start rooting for an Archie-Syesha final two, y’all! That way Cook can get in the recording studio early…and Jason can come stay at my house!

Win win, really.

Don’t forget -last day for entries in this week’s Super Special SHaQ Attack contest. See Monday’s post for all the delicious details. Winner of the prize announced tomorrow.

Also tomorrow? Survivor MAC and hopefully some Top Chef Goodness as well.

And THIS…is the time to dish!

Tags: Writing //