Last night American Idol traveled to Birmingham and it was, for me anyway, the most enjoyable night of auditions yet. A better balance between the good, the bad, and the truly horrifying. I felt bad for Cousin Itt, she did have a Disney heroine kind of voice, but the hair was a wee bit…obsessive. I mean, Crystal Gale made it work for her, but it looks more problematic than marketable. The last chick was amusing. Big Bird was…well, there are no words, really. Baby voice girl is going to get annoying Real Fast. Okay, she was already annoying - more the hand gestures and body posturing than the voice even. Mostly I loved Chris Sligh. He of the mop top of curls and the sly of wit. Make Hasselhoff cry. Ha! He’s my new favorite. I’m still curious to see more of the other singers they put through, but I guess we’ll see that soon enough. How many more nights of this stuff anyway? I’m ready to jump ahead to the competition now, please.

Tonight is the finale of Top Chef. I wish I cared. I almost want Marcel to win at this point just because I’m so disgusted with Ilan. The season as a whole turned into a complete train wreck for me. And not in a fun, reality tv kind of way, either. Top Design premieres tonight after the finale. Maybe they’ll figure it out. Or maybe I just have to wait for My Tim to come back to me.

Keep your SHaQ Attack entries coming! I’m really enjoying seeing which previous pets you all are coming up with. It’s bringing back fun memories for me. Hope you’re enjoying the hunt! What? You missed this week’s contest question? See yesterday’s blog for the details.

Happy Hump Day, y’all!

Tags: Writing by Donna
3 Comments »

Okay, I’ll admit that last week the contest was a little tough. I promised to go easy on ya this week.

Here goes: My little sidekick pup is turning 10 shortly, and my trusty parrot turns 5 a few days later. Seeing as I have something of a menagerie surrounding me here, it’s no surprise that my characters have the occasional beast ruling their roost as well. So…Name any pet from any book I’ve written, as well as the title of the book.

Send your entries to donna@donnakauffman.com with Animal Kingdom in the subject line. Winner’s name will be drawn Friday and announced here.

Happy hunting!

Tags: Writing by Donna
4 Comments »

Grease Goes Live!

So, right off the bat, opening number, the guys are not wowing me. All of the Sandy’s were better than the Danny’s and any one of them could pull this off, but I felt the Brunette Brigade had the edge in voice over the more nasal Blondes. In this performance anyway. Hard to tell. Of course, the blondes had it all over their dark haired competition in the staged (?) catfighting part of the opening number. All of them can dance just fine, but I’m still wishing we could have found better Danny Material. I’ll get over it.

Now we find out how this thing is going to work…Hi Billy! Hi Denise!

Hi Panel! David Ian, the producer, Kathleen Marshall, the Tony winning choreographer, and Jim Jacobs, the guy who wrote Grease Way Back When. They are joined this week by the most famous Sandy of them all, Olivia Newton John.

So, they’re not going to tell us how this works, we’re just going to start meeting Danny’s and I guess at some point two hours from now, we’re going to vote. But then, what more do we need to know anyway, right?

First up are two of the Danny’s - We meet Derek, 26, from West Virginia. He’s one of my Top 3 Danny’s so far. Then we meet Austin, who is so…Austin. He’s 30 (never would have guessed that, 25 tops) from Texas, who wins me over a little bit with the chubby kid story. I like it when he’s just being himself, without all the eye makeup and over plucking.

And now I guess they’re going to sing for us. (Would it have killed them to explain the format? Or are they making this up as they go along? I’m not too sure.)

So Billy nicknames the Danny’s for us because we apparently won’t be able to tell all 6 of them apart (although this might come in handy for the Blonde Sandy Brigade.) Derek is Wholesome Danny and Austin is Hot Danny. And now we sing…

Wholesome Derek starts us off with Crazy Little Thing Called Love. Wholesome Derek wears really tight pants. And he pistons his hips. A lot. Wonder what Hot Austin is going to have to do to top that? Strip? (Which reminds me….where did I put that stack of ones?) Oh, and Derek can sing and be real theatrical just fine.

Before the cheers subside the spotlight is already on Hot Austin, who is singing Mony, Mony (Moany, Moany? Might as well be)…because, well, the boy just needs a pole and a g string, know what I mean? And, I really want to like Austin, he’s over qualified as hell, even though he doesn’t look remotely like a Danny. He’s more a Kenickie. But Austin? Madonna called and she wants you to know that Vogue-ing? Is out. He’s like way too in touch with his Inner Zoolander. You know he’s practiced his Blue Steel. A lot. Yes, Austin, you’re really really ridiculously good looking, but stop with the knowing it part already and we’ll love you a lot more. Oh…and back away from the high notes. Way back. Dear Lord.

Billy calls our two Danny’s to the front of the stage…and now Denise polls our panel. She doesn’t ask me, but of the two, I like Derek better. Way more natural. Olivia is still trying to find her dollar bills. Jim thinks it’s a home run. Kathleen says they set the bar high. David aka Moneybags is happy, probably because advance ticket sales were already in the millions of dollars and I’m sure tonight will just amp that up, but also because these guys don’t suck too much. There’s hope.

Denise implores us to vote for our favorite Danny (she’s really channeling Cat Deeley, but I like her anyway) and drops another tidbit of information that one Danny will be leaving us on the next show. (I guess this means no results show, we find out next Sunday? Who knows. Not me.) They give us their voting phone numbers and finally also tell us you can’t vote until the end of the show, and can also vote online. No voting limits apparently, and no text voting instructions. (Just passing this along in case they never mention it again. You never know.)

Now we meet our first two Sandys…

First up we meet Baby Sandy Allie and Serious Sandy Kate. Allie is 19 and from Tennessee, now living in NYC. We meet her mom and she comes across as being pretty self assured for a teenager. We meet Kate, 22, who is from Ohio and also very self assured. I liked her in the auditions. One of the only blondes whose name stuck with me.

And now? They sing.

Baby Allie starts us off with I Love Rock and Roll. (Okay, pause while I stop laughing hysterically. This is SO not her.) Don’t get me wrong, the girl can sing. But rock? Um. Baby Sandy doesn’t rock. Or writhe. Or…just make her stop. (And is it me, or did the make up and hair team make her look like a 35 year old soccer mom of two? This is a black leather, bump n grind song, which, even in black leather and spiked hair she wouldn’t pull off, but as Donna Reed? Definitely not happening.) Simon would (rightfully) have a field day with this. Where is he when we need him?

And now we get Serious Kate, singing one of the most over sung, over wrought songs of all time, All By Myself. I’m thinking if they’d switched these songs between these two Sandy’s we’d have all had a much better time. Kate sings this just fine, but anyone with a voice could. It’s pure and simple. (Hello, Baby Allie?) I’d have rather seen Kate with I Love Rock N Roll. I did some fast forwarding through both Sandy’s songs. Not boding well for these two. Although Serious Kate seriously sang the closing. (And dang, Baby Allie has some seriously long legs.)

Next! Oh wait, we have to do the panel first… Kathleen praises Allie for her poise at her age and Kate for her voice (agreed) and tells her to loosen up a little. Olivia praises both girls and gushes over footwear. David praises them both, but gushes more over Kate because of her voice. And Jim thinks Baby Allie looks the part but Serious Kate sounds it.

Two more Dannys are about to be introduced and I’m wondering what will their superlatives be?…when Billy drops The Twist on us. Because we apparently Cared That Much (I didn’t, who did? Anyone?) they are bringing back 1 Danny and 1 Sandy from the Elimination Round last week, to bring the total competing to 14 (um, okay….why not just have 14 make it through from the start? I don’t get this.) Anyway, we’re supposed to be all Oooooh, Ahhhh over the fact that Matt and Ashley are back in the running. Woo hoo! Whatever. And now we get the Matt and Ashley Retrospective (like it was months ago and not just LAST WEEK.)

My god this is going to take forever at this pace.

Finally, we learn that these two are going to sing Right Now.

Matt is up first with Pretty Woman. And, I’m sorry, but he’s so gay in this performance. Or maybe he just plays one on tv, but whatever the case, this guy was cut for a reason. Two reasons, actually. Singing and dancing. He can do neither. Poor Second Chance Danny. An easy first cut. Bogus, annoying show filler. Totally unnecessary. What, is Matt’s dad a lawyer and threatened to sue or something? Why, producers? Why?

Ashley gets to (NOT) wow us with Looks Like We Made It. This is painful and embarrassing. I fast forwarded for her sake. No really.

We get a glimpse of all the Danny’s and Sandy’s seated in some Contestant Balcony Section of the audience (who is producing this thing? Continuity, please. Look it up.) And Billy sends these two to the panel for judging. There is no way they can butter these two up. Please. I beg of you. Put them (and when I say them, I mean me) out of their misery.

Kathleen praises their looks (nice save) but says they’re tentative. (Tentative must be the new word for Untalented.) David also says the only nice thing he can about Matt (looks the part) then speaks the truth about the horrible singing. Thank you, Simon-Dave. He gives Ash the same treatment. Jim stutters. Olivia finds them charming and avoids being Negative Sandy Senior. So sub-standard compared to those in the opening number singers. So, again I ask you….why bring them back? I don’t get it. Rooting for the Untrained Underdog is fine….but they have to have the talent pool to draw from to make us care. These two? Not going to happen.

FINALLY we get to the next Real Danny and Sandy. (Suddenly the Danny’s we have are looking a lot better to me. Maybe that was the reason to bring back Second Chance Danny.) Point made. Move it along now for all our sakes.

We meet Danny Jason and Danny Max. Max is the one they kept telling us had this amazing voice. What he needs is an amazing chin to go with it. No matter what they do, this guy is not going to have the right Broadway Looks to pull this off. I’m so sorry, Max. I don’t mean to be superficial, but looks matter in this particular endeavor and I just don’t see you as the heartthrob I need to buy you as Danny. I would like to at least hear this amazing voice you’re supposed to have, though. Jason is my other Top 3 Danny and the one I liked in the opening number. A lot. He’s got the looks, the voice, he’s big and alpha and well…do I have any dollars left? Wait, he’s not Stripper Danny? A shame, that.

Aaaaand, the joke is SO on me! Jason, 31, we learn, is from Utah, and…he’s Mormon. Yes, please laugh and laugh (at me.) I did. And maybe he’s not quite as alpha as I thought, but he’s still Top 3 for me. Max? Not so much. We learn that Max, 22, is from Arizona, is now in LA, and is a total slacker. Slacker Danny. He says he’s completely laid back (read: lazy.) He has more chin than I gave him credit for, and seems to be a popular fellow with the other contestants. But…still Not Danny to me.

Boy Band Danny Jason is up first with Faith. Boy Band Jason wiggles a lot for a Mormon. I’m all for wiggling Mormons as it turns out. Good dancing, good performer, singing voice is a little light, but we forgive.

Slacker Danny Max follows with Summer of 69. Show us this amazing voice, Slacker Max. So…the boy can sing, and he’s got rhythm, and he can perform, but he’s the leading man’s buddy material. The girls love him and he is a good performer. Sadly, Slacker Max is still not in my Top 3.

Panel? Jim…bumble, mumble. Kathleen praises their performance skills, which is correct. David wants more depth than pop boy band. He feels Max has the character of Danny down. (And I’d go for that. I just wish he looked the part more.) Olivia is Sandy Paula, spreading the love, but coherently….and we move on.

Time for the next two Sandy’s – Small Town Sandy Laura is 21 and from Minnesota, where she is currently playing Sandy in regional theater. She is one of The Brunettes and I remember liking her, but she’s not my Top Brunette. Or my Top Sandy. She is, however, freshly engaged, so she’s also Bridal Sandy. Kathleen Sandy is 23, married, and from NYC. She is Gospel Singer Sandy and I otherwise don’t remember her at all from the auditions. Another one of The Blondes.

Singing time – Small Town Laura sings Why Do Fools Fall In Love, looking like she’s torn between Broadway singing! And a round of tennis! She’s Girl Next Door Sandy! Gidget Sandy! We get it already! Ooooh, she’s also Naughty Ankle Boots Sandy. I just noticed those. She projects personality, she’s cute…voice is a little wobbly, but she can sing. Still….not my Top 3 Sandy either, I don’t think. I’d actually go for Serious Kate over her.

Okay, Spiritual Sandy Kathleen scares me. She’s singing Suddenly, I See and, really, she’s Stepford Sandy. Dead Eyes Sandy. Ooooh, Carrie Sandy! Shiver. She’s wearing something that makes her look like First Trimester Sandy, except for the stick legs. (Was that a pre-requisite? Must have legs like twigs to be Sandy? I’m thinking so.) She’s Bottom 3 Sandy for me. Creeps me out.

Panel? Olivia (also a bit Stepford with the plastic surgery, dare I say it) likes them both (big shock.) David reveals that they’ve been auditioning for the other roles this week and he feels Gidget Laura is too sweet and would be eaten alive (agreed.) About Kathleen, he says her performance was fantastic. David must like blondes. A lot. Kathleen felt Stepford Kathleen was also wonderful (what spell did Carrie Kathleen weave?) and wants Gidget Laura to step it up a notch. Jim….I don’t care what Jim thinks. He’s just there to essentially drool and ogle.

Next! We get Olivia’s Tips on How To Be Sandy. We get a glimpse of Sandy Olivia and Danny Travolta and remember why we loved that movie enough to watch this show. Then we get a Sandy Q & A session, which, it’s late, I confess I just ff’d this part.

Final two Danny’s…My other Top Three, Chad and we also get Kevin. Kevin, 22, is from upstate New York. He’s Bell Hop Danny. And awwww, he’s great with his granddad. Smooches, Kevin Danny. He could be Top 3. (Look out Austin!) Chad, 27, from Long Beach, is my other Top 3. He’s Mr. Personality. I think he’s got it all. #1 Danny for me so far.

Bell Hop Danny Kevin starts us out with Walking in Memphis and seriously gives Mormon Jason Danny a run for Top 3 in the Boy Band Division. A little Baby Boy Face for Danny, but he’s a great performer and singer. I like this guy. A lot. But as Danny? Not sure. He’s Cutie Danny to me.

Ambitious Danny Chad (really? Couldn’t they do better than that?) sings Signed, Sealed, Delivered. Yeah, Ambitous Chad is my #1 Danny. A little boy band-y, but he has the look. It’s between him and Jason, although for all his Mormon wiggling Chad delivers the alpha guy a bit more believably than Jason. Pretty Boy Danny. And pssst, Austin? That’s how you hit the high notes. Okay, my son just totally ruined this by calling him Donny Osmond Danny. Sadly, he has a point. But hey, many moons ago I thought Donny Osmond was It. So Pretty Boy Danny could be the New It.

Panel? I don’t even care what the panel thinks at this point. Mostly, they all agree with me. What more do we need to know?

Final 2 Sandy’s – Brunette Sandy Juliana, my #1 Sandy, 23 from Los Angeles. I think she could be the most believable Sweet to Sexy Sandy. Ballerina Sandy Ashley Spencer, 21, from Ohio is another Blonde Sandy but with scary dark eyebrows. She reminds me of someone and I finally figured it out: that mean girl from Little House on the Prairie.

Here we go with the last of the singing…Rock Chick Sandy Juliana (really, Billy? You’re losing me here) is up with First Cut is the Deepest. Might as well have called her Biker Chick Sandy for all it doesn’t fit. Whatever. She needs to dial it down out of Minnie Mouse range, but I still think she has the edge. Real Sandy Juliana has my vote.

Ballerina Sandy (Ha! He heard me!) Ashley Spencer ends the night with It’s In His Kiss. Okay. Sigh. Ballerina Sandy Ashley Spencer has It. Yeah. I know. Figures. But, aside from the over warbly voice, she has that Reese Witherspoon Spark thing going that just gets and holds your attention. How did this happen? Two Blonde Sandy’s make my Top 3. Where is the justice I ask you? But, much as the dark eyebrows scare me, she might be our real frontrunner here.

Yeah, yeah, Panel, yadda yadda, whatever.

We get a final group performance…to We Go Together. They look all 50’s and fun and colorful and I realize that I really need to start seeing the Danny’s and the Sandy’s sing and dance and react off of each other in a twosome setting. We need to understand the chemistry stuff. Soon, show producers? Not enough to go by in these group gigs.

Now the panel gives us their number 1 picks of the night: David? Wholesome Derek and Ballerina Ashley Spencer. Kathleen? Hot Austin and Baby Allie. (Really?) Jim? Pretty Boy Chad and Serious Kate. (I can get behind that one.) Olivia picks them all.

So, my Danny Recap: Top 3? Pretty Boy Chad, Mormon Jason, and I’m torn between Hot Austin and Baby Face Kevin. Bottom 3? Wholesome Derek, Slacker Max. Voted off? Second Chance Matt, of course.

Sandy Recap: Top 3? In order: Ballerina Ashley Spencer, Rock Chick Juliana, and Serious Kate. Bottom 3: Gidget Laura, Baby Allie, Stepford Kathleen. Voted off? Second Chance Ashley.

Bringing back The Twisters was really lame. I hope they’re gone next week (wait, it’s two weeks - Super Bowl Avoidance I suppose.) Then we can really start the show. Again. At least we’ll understand the rules going in. Oh! We get a super cool surprise guest next time. Andrew Lloyd-Webber. Whoa. About as Top Dog as you can get. I hope he dishes more directly on the panel than That Nice Olivia. (Gotta love her, but she out-nices Paula.)

Okay, Blog Babes…Reaction? Votes? Discuss.

Oh, and tune in tomorrow for the SHaQ Attack contest!

Tags: Writing by Donna
1 Comment »

…must be time to announce the SHaQ Attack winner! Woo hoo!

Well, this week was pretty tough, as I’ve had my share of snowbound romances. But the one that fit the “snowbound in a cabin” description was Dark Knight, one of my old Loveswepts. I had faith, though, and Four Fabulous Blog Babes did come up with the right answer. So…all four of you win!! Jennifer Y, Mel, Lee, and Joyce, you all get a book from my website bookshelf (this includes my March release, The Great Scot if you so choose.) Send a few title selections (in case I’m out of your first choice) and your address and I will get it in the mail with my next batch.
Congratulations!

Tune in next week for the next SHaQ Attack hunt…I promise I’ll go easier on ya.

So, last night on Grey’s Anatomy it was a lot more fun to watch than last week’s show. Am I the only one who has a harder time watching Isaiah now? I’ve never exactly loved his character, but it’s harder to watch him interact with the other actors now. I hate that I’m pulled out of the story that way, but hopefully it will fade in time.

The Amish storyline was interesting and sad. I loved that Alex confronted Addison and told her she didn’t have to avoid him because he could actually control himself in her presence (and he still wants her - bad - you just know it. But I loved the direction the writers went with there.) Liked Mer and Der this week. Liked how George and Izzy bonded in their shared grief. Loved Bailey returning to form, and all four of the leading doctors at Seattle Grace sitting on the floor like they were in time out while she lectured them on her disappointment. Loved even more when Richard told her she was a future chief. Loved the look on her face.

The promised surprises in the last few minutes definitely got me. George proposing to Callie. Saw that one coming, thought he was such a cutie patootie….will she say yes? Given the circumstances in his life…should she say yes? Loved Cristina finally relenting and speaking, and the speech she gave. Mouth dropped open when Burke countered by proposing. Like I said, I’m not a huge Burke fan, but I loved that moment. Was all excited that McSteamy might be leaving - gorgeous man, hate the character he plays. Just nothing much to root for there and usually they’re better about making every character both flawed and redeeming. So I’m conflicted on him staying. Not conflicted that the chief might stay. Heart wrenching moment when he realized his wife had moved on and was with another man. So deserved - months, Richard? As she said…what did you expect? - but still poignant and sad. All in all, a Grey’s Anatomy filled with Grey Goodness. Next week? Looks like we get back to the medical part of what makes Grey’s a Must See show. Can’t wait!

It was the wee hours when I finally got to watch Grey’s so I unfortunately haven’t watched Men in Trees yet…but I’m all excited to see in the previews that Jane is back in Elmo. More Plow Guy! I hope anyway. What I really want is Less Lynn! But I’m sure that will take awhile. I hope the writers are perusing various message boards and see the absolute united loathing people have for that storyline. Justine Bateman has zilch chemistry with Jack. Even if I hate the storyline - and I do - they’d have a chance to sway me if there was even an iota of hot between those two. I can’t believe we wasted a good couch scene and a half naked Jack last week…on Cold Fish Lynn. Ugh. But I have faith! I do! Just don’t make me wait too long through this silly detour.

Have a great weekend everyone! Skiing for me…and some Grand Slam tennis. Woo hoo!

Tags: Writing by Donna
11 Comments »

So…American Idol moves to New York, and they put through 33 people to Hollywood. We got to see, what, five or so of them? And honestly, I know these early rounds are more about showing us the range of freak show elements that show up hoping to be the next American Idol, but they could have just shown us Isadora and been done with it. After her…well, we get it. I sort of thought she was just putting them on, there were flashes of “I’m just pretending to be psychotic to get on tv”…but then, I’m not so sure. But that pretty much sums up the fringe element right there. No need to look further. More good singers now, please. And was I the only one who thought Carole Bayer Sager looked like she was doing her Alexis Carrington impression? I liked her, though. Next week? Alabama.

On Top Chef, we have the final four in Hawaii and, for the most part, everyone behaved. We are all reminded of why Marcel is such a weenie. Not that this remotely excuses the bullying, but he is an annoying child. Sam brought the hotness, Elia looked cute in her pixie do. Ilan was just Ilan. All in all, any of them deserves to win based on skill and talent, though I’d give the edge to Sam over all.

We’re in Part One of the finale and they have to do a twist on a traditional luau. They are told that two of the four will be eliminated, leaving two to go to the finals. Everyone does a nice job with it, except I thought Marcel’s was just plain weird with all his chemicals and foams, but everyone liked the taste, so who am I to judge? I had no idea who was going to go home, and the judges seemed stumped as well, as no one really dropped the ball. My gut said Elia and Marcel would be leaving, but, in the end, it was Elia and Sam. Noooo. This leaves us with Marcel and Ilan? Yeah. I guess I should have seen that coming with the editing, but it’s such a disappointing finale to a disappointing season. I’d have preferred Sam and Elia. I feel they had the most integrity over all (not saying much this season, but I could have rooted for them as chefs. Instead we get the two most childish.) I hope next season it can be more about the food, with chefs who can act like adults. One more show to go and I honestly could care less who wins. A shame. It could have been fun.

One more day to enter this week’s SHaQ Attack…I’ll announce the winner tomorrow!

Tags: Writing by Donna
5 Comments »

More American Idol auditions…

But first, a SHaQ Attack update! So…yep, I have written stories where my characters get stuck on a train in a snowstorm and a hotel in a snowstorm and in a cabin with no snowstorm. (Hey, I didn’t say it wasn’t going to be tricky!) But there is one book where they get stuck in a cabin in a snowstorm. A few Blog Babes have gotten this one right, so I’m going to hold out for the right answer on this one. If you’ve guessed any of the others above and want to try again, please feel free. (And did I mention that my author copies of The Great Scot came in? It’s up for grabs to this week’s winner if they choose!)

So, okay…on American Idol, we went to Memphis. And it was better than Seattle, but then, what wouldn’t be? Sure, we get our share of…interesting individuals, but there were more singers put through there than the other two locations. Would have been nice to actually get to HEAR more than two or three of them, but what can you do? At least the one locked door thing didn’t seem to be as big an issue this time (but what is up with that anyway? And how do they get almost similar looking rooms/doors in each hotel?) As for the singers…I liked Sundance, thought the new father was just okay, and got a kick out of the background singer. I also admit to smiling at the story-writing Elvis wannabe who, when asked by Simon how his life story would end, said, “With a period.” Good times.

But it would have been nice, at the end when they showed all those folks waving that yellow Hollywood Ticket To Stardom And Fame as they busted out of the (unlocked) door, to have actually, oh, I don’t know, heard more than three of them sing during an hour long program. Tonight we get New York City auditions. We also get Top Chef. I wish I still cared, but this season’s contestants have turned the show into a circus. Honestly, worst reality show contestants ever. They should bring back any combination of last years contestants to replace them. There are a half dozen from last season who deserve a win over any of these schlubs. Not that I’m bitter or anything.

On a more fun note, have any of you hunted down Janet Evanovich’s latest “Between the Numbers” Stephanie Plum book? I just picked it up and it’s nice to have a short reunion with all of our Trenton pals to tide me over until the summer full length release. And, just a few short weeks until Susan Elizabeth Phillips next one is out. Good times, indeed!

Happy Wednesday all!

Tags: Writing by Donna
4 Comments »

Yesterday was our first official snow day here (unfortunately they didn’t close all the businesses, too, so I had to go to work, dangit) but I just love the whole feeling of snow days. Lounging in bed until later in the morning, wearing slippers all day, catching up on some reading…

Anyway, in honor of our first Snow Day here, the SHaQ Attack contest this week asks this question: What book of mine strands my hero and heroine in a cabin during a snow storm?

Send your entries to donna@donnakauffman.com with “Snow Day” in the subject line. I’ll choose a winner from the correct entries on Friday. Happy hunting!

Tags: Writing by Donna
4 Comments »

So, I’m over The Apprentice. This season has just jumped the shark so incredibly far there is no hope of saving it. Part of me was appalled when Michelle smiled and quit and didn’t seem to grasp what she was doing (to her own cred, and the jeopardy she was putting her own team in) and part of me wanted to stand up and cheer. “I didn’t sign up for this crap and I’m not taking any more.” Ahahahahahahahahaaha. I sort of thought it was hilarious. Which was when I realized I really didn’t want to watch this show anymore. Not that I ever liked His Hairdom, but I found the premise of the show interesting despite him. Now? Not so much. Not even a little. Which Michelle’s defection sort of summed up for me. So…buh bye, Apprentice. Someone else can blog ya. Won’t be me.

On the night’s other reality program, Grease, we narrow things down to our 12 finalists, who will start competing next week in an American Idol kinda way for our votes. I thought it was sort of odd that we spent as long as we did on the audition phase, then just wham! down to 12 in one hour. If that’s all the air time we had, then I wanted more of the academy experience and a lot less of the audition phase. I thought it was interesting to see the grueling schedule they were being put through, and what they had to accomplish. (Although that tap on the shoulder thing while they kept singing the same song over….and over….and over….was wrong in so many ways.)

I still wish I knew I teeny tiny bit more about the contestants as, though there are some who stand out a bit more than others, I can’t say I’m attached or rooting for anyone specifically. I still like the premise, like the show, and look forward to where it goes next…but I wish I was more excited about the folks trying to win it. I think they’ll do fine with whoever wins the role of Sandy. Danny, I’m not so sure about. I can’t believe those 6 guys were the best they could do. Although, it appears there is some huge twist next week. I fear they’re going to bring in theater vets to compete with them - which nicely covers David Ian’s 10 million dollar investment, but is incredibly unfair to the process of the show and what it promised these kids…and us viewers. We’ll see. But I will keep watching this one. Eventually I might even remember their names!

Tune in tomorrow for this week’s SHaQ Attack contest!

Tags: Writing by Donna
2 Comments »

But first…this week’s SHaQ Attack winner. The contest question was to name all the characters I’ve written with Morgan as their last name. Jace, Austin, Burke, Tag, and Shane were the initial five, and the super sleuthing Blog Babes also discovered Tucker (from Tease Me) and April (from Tango in Paradise.) The winner this week is Cathy M from California, who got all seven Morgan’s and therefore gets two books! Woo hoo, Cathy! A round of ice cream and a cheer!

Tune in next week for the next SHaQ Attack contest. Also…check out my guest blog today over on Brava Authors (link to your right under “Writer Buds.”)

So, here’s the latest from Reality News on the upcoming All Star edition of Amazing Race…premiering February 18th! I’m a little surprised at who is back…a few teams I really like, a bunch I really don’t. Should be an…interesting season!

‘The Amazing Race: All-Stars’ teams glad to give the race another try’
By Christopher Rocchio, 01/17/2007

Phil Keoghan, host of CBS’ The Amazing Race, said there was no question the long-running reality competition series needed to have an All-Stars edition.

“It had to happen… the fans wanted to see some of their favorite teams come back,” said Keoghan. “We have all the ingredients for an amazing The Amazing Race. These teams are so dynamic, they’re the teams that everyone has been talking about over the last ten seasons.. we’ve got such an eclectic mix of people.”

Set to premiere on Sunday, February 18 at 8PM ET/PT, The Amazing Race: All-Stars will have seven of the series’ ten previous editions represented in the competition, but that’s not the only factor that will set them apart.

“To put together all these teams, we had to figure out not only who the winners were, but who the most popular, most loved and most hated were, and we wanted to build teams like that,” Elise Dogantieri, who co-created the series with her husband Bertram Van Munster, said in an inteview conducted shortly before The Amazing Race: All-Stars began filming back in November.

The most recognizable returning team is probably Rob and Amber Mariano, who fell in love during the filming of Survivor: All-Stars, where Rob finished second to Amber. They then competed in The Amazing Race 7, but came-up just short of victory, finishing second. Afterward, they got married in a ceremony broadcast a CBS reality TV special.

“There’s really no competition. It’s just a formality we have to go through this whole thing,” said Rob before the Race began. “It’s going to be fun though to mess with people. I’ve got a whole new bag of tricks for this season. I mean it’s the All-Stars. It wouldn’t be right if I didn’t have something new.”

One team that will be keeping a close eye on Rob and Amber are married couple Uchenna and Joyce Agu, who finished first in The Amazing Race 7. Uchenna and Joyce even shaved their heads to win, and it looks like their determined attitude is back for another season.

“They’re all gunning for our title,” said Joyce. “And we’re here to hold onto it.”

Life partners Joe Baldassare and Bill Bartek may have something to say about that. Third place finishers from the first season of The Amazing Race, the self-proclaimed “Team Guido” have been pegged as villains for the upcoming All-Stars edition.

“We really are loveable. There’s nothing to be afraid of. This is going to hurt us more than it hurts you,” said Bartek, who quickly changed his tune. “There’s no way I’m going to be nice to some of these people. There’s no chance in hell.”

Familiar with Team Guido’s tactics are lifelong friends Kevin O’Connor and Drew Feinberg, who also competed in The Amazing Race’s first season and finished in fourth place. However they seem to be a bit less imposing than their Season One competitors.

“We’re 41-year-old babies,” said Feinberg. “That’s the way we carry on, like little kids.”

One of the teams in All-Stars competed against each other the first time they were on the series during The Amazing Race 9. Despite Eric Sanchez finishing second with his partner and Danielle Turner coming in seventh with hers, the duo formed a bond that developed into romance and they’ve been dating for the past year. Turner said she thinks fans like their storyline, which is why they were chosen for All-Stars.

“No one really believes that we hooked up on the show and that we actually had a relationship afterwards,” said Turner.

In stark contrast to Turner and Sanchez are John Vito Pietanza and Jill Aquilino, who finished fifth on The Amazing Race’s third season when they were romantically involved. They’ve since been split for the last two years, but Aquilino said the differences that caused the break-up shouldn’t get in the way.

“We still always remained in contact and close,” she said.

The duo of former lovers could have used some pointers from Teri and Ian Pollack, married parents that finished second during The Amazing Race’s third season. They are still the oldest couple to ever finish in second place.

“I’m hoping that they react like they did during our first Race,” said Ian of the competition. “‘They’re the old couple, they’re chopped liver,’ and we’re going to run right over them.”

Best friends Ozwald Mendez and Danilo Jimenez finished fourth on The Amazing Race 2, and know they have a reputation for being fun-loving partiers.

“We know how to live and we know where to go,” said Jimenez. “We live well, but that’s not all we are.”

Cousins Charla Baklayan Faddoul and Mirna Hindoyan were proud of the way they played when they finished sixth on The Amazing Race 5, which is what brought them back for the All-Stars edition.

“We’re not intimidated by anybody. This is an equal playing field for all of us,” said Hindoyan. “There are strong and big men, attractive people who use flattery, and then there’s us.”

The most recent competitors returning for the All-Stars installment are from The Amazing Race’s tenth season, and include fourth-place finishers Kandice Pelletier and now-married Dustin Seltzer and sixth-place finishers David Conley, Jr. and his wife Mary.

“We’ve got people stopping us everywhere, and everybody knows our name now,” said Mary. Added David, “We’re down to earth. We don’t change for TV.”

The spotlight isn’t new for Seltzer and Pelletier, both former beauty queens who are determined to prove to the world that they’re more than just pretty faces.

“People have learned that we are tough girls,” said Seltzer. “We are silly and like to laugh, and we do have our blonde moments. But we are willing to push ourselves.”

Filmed late last year, The Amazing Race: All-Stars required the teams travel more than 45,000 miles and visit five continents in only 28 days. Stops included Argentina, Mozambique and Chile.

Tags: Uncategorized by Donna
8 Comments »

So, which was worse? American Idol or Top Chef. Okay, so AI wins that one hands down. I was almost convulsively pushing the fast forward button the entire two hours. On the one hand, I just can’t stand watching those poor, poor folks who truly think their dreams are going to be answered only to be laughed at and ridiculed, and it’s just hurtful to watch. And on the other hand, I can’t imagine how incredibly frustrating it must be to sit there as a judge and not laugh or ridicule these truly delusional folks who keep coming through that door. So, I’m torn, but either way, I just can’t watch. FF’d them all.

As for the actual talent, I thought the brother-sister duo was good, though I think big sis isn’t going to like it that little bro is going to get more attention. I liked the afro guy, reminded me a bit of the Neville’s. The young girl whose dad played for the NFL, she was good. I don’t even remember the rest. Mostly it was just a blur of freak show badness. And what, 14 people made it through out of all that mess? Maybe Memphis will be better. I’m more interested in a few weeks from now when the finalists are working toward being on the show itself and we’re past the freak show element.

Speaking of freak show, what the what was going on at the Top Chef apartments? After a good Quick Fire and an even better Elimination Challenge, they all had back to the apartments and suddenly it’s Lord of the Flies time. Elia, the sole remaining sane one, shaves her head, as does Ilan, then they get this brilliant idea to go after Marcel - as a joke. Some joke. And Elia? Hon? You were the only friend he had and even you didn’t step in?

Cliff, who you see from the apartment footage is an even bigger guy than I’d realized - dang, those shoulders and arms are massive! - goes after Marcel and actually wrestles him to the floor. It’s ugly and horrifying to watch, and I don’t care how much alcohol was involved, there was no excuse for it. I’m not a Marcel fan, but dear god, no one should be put through that, especially after all the relentless picking they do on him.

So, Cliff is very rightfully asked to leave (and his surprised face when Tom informs him of this, as if a simple apology should have been enough, is enough for me to agree even more whole-heartedly than I did before.) Did they all realize what they did was wrong? Sure. But did they truly appreciate the extent of how terrifying that moment was for Marcel? I dunno.

And really, how embarrassed is the cast and crew of these idiots? They bring in some of the best chefs in the world to judge them, then sit there and look like fools when these guys can’t keep their act together. It’s mortifying, I’m sure.

This leaves the final four of Marcel, Elia, Sam, and Ilan. The judges reveal in private convo that Cliff would have been the one eliminated anyway (glad they officially asked him to leave instead, though. Get some help, Cliff.) Now they had to decide if the remaining 4 go to Hawaii for the finals, or if they still send someone home. Sam and Ilan are told they are going through. Then after much torture, Elia and Marcel are told they are going with, too. All is happy, except, you know, I still want to throw up.

Who do I want to win? Well, now? I have no idea and don’t know that I care. What a train wreck of a season. I’d say Sam or Elia deserve it the most of the final four and would likely do the most with the prize, but all of them have left a foul taste in my mouth. Not exactly what you want to be feeling during a food competition.

Thank goodness I can cleanse my palate with a round of Grey’s Anatomy and Men in Trees. Except, oh yeah, the cast of Grey’s, or one cast member in particular (yes, I’m looking at you Isaiah) has stupidly resurrected his less than finest moment and actually found a way to make it worse, dragging a cast that should be ecstatically reveling in their Golden Globe win for best Drama Series, right back into the gutter of controversy. If Shonda & Co. do not fire this guy - he blatantly lied! Poor TR! - then my love for the integrity they espouse in their writing will go the way of my Top Chef love.

Which leaves Men In Trees. What are the chances Justine Bateman’s contract is already up and she leaves? Now. I would really like that. What I’d like even more is if they’d let the character played by Jason O’Mara speak with the man’s real Irish accent. Ahhhhh. That would have been lovely, wouldn’t it? I’m stilly liking him, and liking him with Marin. Can’t wait to see what happens with the town hooker being back in town, too (they’d better explain where she left her son, btw.)

And amidst all this fun and frivolity, don’t forget to get your entries in for this week’s SHaQ Attack contest. See Tuesday/Wednesday blogs for all the details. I’ll announce the winner tomorrow!

Tags: Writing by Donna
5 Comments »